I like to do a little poetry from time to time and thought I would entertain my rather massive readership with a little something about my experience in hell:
I should have known better
when he talked to me in all those love letters
I should have tried more voraciously to understand
that ordering the execution of women and children was a moral and justified plan
Like a good father sometimes does, God did some things to his children that they just couldn’t comprehend
This seems to be an ongoing but necessary Old Testament trend
But, now his infinite justice has been served
A never ending punishment is what I deserve
I should have listened more keenly to Pascal’s Wager
even though it seemed implausible according to Occam’s razor
I should have realized that Christianity was the only way
and all these other religions were just there to lead me astray
People in India should have come to their senses
instead of believing in Hinduism and committing such deleterious offenses
They should have came to the Christian nation where corruption is a thing of the past
and learn about Jesus’ love that will always last
Instead, Gandhi is burning in hell with me for getting it all wrong
We could be together in heaven singing praiseful songs
There is no end to my torment here in sight
I should have just believed even when my mind was telling me something didn’t seem right
But, god loves me so much that he sent me to the place I asked to go to all along
I didn’t believe in hell either but that was clearly wrong
God really did make us out of dirt from the ground
Evolution and its many discoveries were god’s trickery and markedly unsound
He was just testing our faith and seeing if we would still hold strong
just like he did to Peter when the rooster sang its song
Dude. Harry. This is *awesome*.
ReplyDelete